At the noise which she made Down went the spade !— And up jump'd the bandy-legg'd Tailor by trade,' So extremely profound, The moment her shadowy form met his view He gave vent to a sort of a lengthen'd' Bo-o-ho-o !'— Made one grasshopper spring to the door-and was gone! As at Rome they would phrase it His flight was so swift, the eye scarcely could trace it, I doubt if the Ghost could have vanish'd more quickly;— And it's said never rightly recover'd his wits, While the chuckling old Hag takes his place, and there sits! I'll venture to say, She'd sat there to this day, Brooding over what Cobbett calls vile yellow clay,' Come to look for her pelf; But not, like the Tailor, to dig, delve, and grovel, Such tools would not do, Far other the weapons he brought into play, Holy Water, two buckets, (Made with salt-half a peck to four gallons-which brews a Strong triple X strike,'-see Jacobus de Chusa.) With these, too, he took His bell and his book— Not a nerve ever trembled,—his hand never shook And now, for the reason I gave you before, Of what pass'd then and there I can tell you no more, * See Miscellany, January, 1841. But I've always been told, For which she her 'jewel eternal' had sold, Who, no doubt, knew her man, Made some compromise-hit upon some sort of plan, That the things done amiss By the Hag should not hinder her ultimate bliss'; The cash from this time is The Church's-impounded for good pious uses- In the meantime, that She, The said Ghostess,—or Ghost, as the matter may be,— The said Friar, with said Ghost may hereafter agree.— Of the said cash, or "cole," Shall be spent for the good of said Old Woman's soul! 'It is farther agreed-while said cash is so spending, Said Ghost shall be fully absolved from attending, And shall quiet remain In the grave, her domain, To have, and enjoy, and uphold, and maintain, From Old Nick, or from any one else of his train, Whether Pow'r,-Domination,-or Princedom,-or Throne,* 'Provided that, nevertheless, notwithstanding Dispensing said cash, or said "cole," shall dare venture To misapply money, note, bill, or debenture, To uses not named in this present Indenture, Then that such sum or sums shall revert, and come home again Some good man and true, who no longer refuses To put sum or sums aforesaid to said uses; Which duly performed, the said Ghost shall have rest, Thrones! Dominations! Princedoms! Virtues! Powers! MILTON. In consideration of this, her bequest, In manner and form aforesaid, as exprest: Hereunto set our hands and our seals-and no more said, BASIL. OLD WOMAN (late) CLOTHED IN GREY.' Basil now, I am told, Walking off with the gold, Went and straight got the document duly enroll'd, In her sepulchre, cosey, cool,-not to say cold. Rich Malvoisie wine Found its way to the Convent that night before nine, At a very late hour, that is after Compline. With fresh lustre, as though newly dug from the mine ; That the Convent was much better off as to cheer. While in front and in rear He enlarged so, his shape seem'd approaching a sphere. The girl, as they say, Ran screaming away, Quite scared by the Old Woman clothed in grey; As the bird on the spray, One Sir Rufus Mountfardington, Lord of Foot's-cray, And the fact was, said Knight was now merely delay'd For converting the Pagans with bill, bow, and blade, To buy arms and horses, the tools of his trade, Thought Sir Rufus, 'tis said, Just the man for her money,-she readily paid Most unwisely she laid Out her cash-the beaux yeux of a Saracen maid Him to do everything which a Knight could degrade, Don't fancy, dear Reader, I mean to go on Of the Squires and the Dames Who have managed at times to get hold of the sack, To be giv'n in my song, There are reasons beside would perhaps make it wrong; And show'd herself very se -vere against heresy, While many a wretch scorned to flinch, or to scream, as he Burnt for denying the Papal supremacy, Bishop Bonner the bag got, Releas'd, as he spent all in fuel and faggot. I can't tell you, I vow I suppose by mismanagement-ere the next reign The last time, I'm told, That the Old Woman's gold Was obtain'd, as before, for the asking,-'twas had And the whole of it, so 'tis reported, was sent So 'tis said at Maynooth, But I can't think it's truth; Though I know it was boldly asserted last season, GENTLE READER !-you must know the proverb, I think— In a square College cap, Perhaps, would translate by the words Verbum Sap. !' That you're going to France In the course of this Spring-we're already in May- Pray, If but for a day, At Dover, through which you must pass on your way, First DINE!-you can do That on joint or ragoût Then say to the waiter, I'm just passing through, Well, when you've got there, never mind how you're taunted, The proprietor's name; but he's one of that sect Who call themselves 'Friends,' and whom others call 'Quakers,'- To the cellar at night, And as soon as you see her don't be in a fright, At once, for the bag! If you find that she's shy, or your senses would dazzle, ་ If she gives it you, seize It, and do as you please But there is not a person I've ask'd but agrees, You should spend-part at least--for the Old Woman's ease. May do you some good, and I WISH YOU MAY GET IT!!! THOS. INGOLDSBY. |