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Lord G. Your ladyship has so much of both, that I can't help being proud of any thing that recommends me to your esteem.

Lady G. Upon my word, my lord, you have a great share on't, and I think very deservedly: 't is not a common thing in this town, to find a gentleman of your figure, that has courage enough to keep marriage in countenance, especially when 'tis so much the mode to be severe upon 't.

Lord G. Now that to me is an intolerable vanity, to see a man ashamed of being honourably happy, because 'tis the fashion to be viciously wretched. I don't know how it may be with other people, but if I were married, I should as much tremble to speak lightly of my wife, as my religion.

Mrs. Con. O the hypocritical monster! When he knows I know, if he were to be hanged, he 'd scarce think it a reprieve to be married. [Aside.] "There's

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roguery at the bottom of all this, I'm sure-The "devil does not use to turn saint for nothing."

Lady Gent. I am in hopes your ladyship's good opinion of marriage will persuade you not to be long out of it: we that feel the happiness of a condition ourselves, naturally wish our friends in it.

Mrs. Con. What do you think of me, my Lord, you know I have been about you a great while?

Lord G. Fy, fy! you marry! A mere rake! Mrs. Con. O but I fancy now, a man of your sobriety and stayed temper, would soon reform me. Lord G. This subtle devil "smoaks me!". E

We

are mortals, faith-It shews her a little jealous how

ever.

[Aside.

Mrs. Con. I'll be whipped if ever you marry more to your mind; what signifies two or three thousand pounds in one's fortune, where you are sure it would be made up in good-humour and obedience.

Lord G. And considering how intimate a footing you and I have always conversed upon; what a venerable figure should I make in the solemn authority of an husband, pretending to command you.

Lady Gent. O! if you were married, there would be but one will between you.

Lord G. There's the danger, madam: there being but one, we should certainly squabble, who should have it. I should like Mrs. Conquest, perhaps, for my wife's companion: one as a light allay to the softness of the other's temper: but if I were once fix'd in love, and should unfortunately bolt upon the least glimpse of jealousy, I am such a slave to tenderness, I know 't would break my heart.

tea."

"Mrs. Con. Now could I wash his face with my [Aside. Lady Gent. Well, I am confident my lord would make an extreme good husband.

Lord G. I don't know but I really might, if I could persuade any woman beside your ladyship to think so.

Mrs. Con. How artfully the monster screws himself into her good opinion; I must take him down a little -[Aside.] Pray, my lord, how many women have you had of late, by way of balm, to heal the slight wound I gave you?

Lord G. Upon my faith, madam, I had my wound and cure from the same person: my passion for you went forward like Penelope's web; whatever your eyes did in the day, a very short reflection upon your temper unravell'd at night; so that if you will needs know the truth, I have not been reduc'd of late to apply myself for relief to any body but your ladyship. [Affects an insulting laugh.

Ha ha! ha! ha!

Mrs. Con. Well, he has a glorious assurance!

Lord G. I fancy, Mrs. Conquest, you measure my principles by your own; for by your question you seem to think me a very wild creature.

Mrs. Con. O fy, my lord! so far from it, that I never saw any thing so astonishingly modest.

Lord G. Not so modest, neither, madam; but if my Lady Gentle will give me leave, I dare use you most intolerably for this.

Lady Gent. Ev'n as you please, my lord; for I confess her assurance is enough to dash any one out of

countenance.

Lord G. Does your ladyship hear that, madam! Remember, now, that I am allowed the modester per. son; but to let you see, that in a just cause I scorn to take the advantage of my character, I'll lay it aside for once, and with an honest freedom tell you, your attempts upon me are vain; you are homely, downright homely; and if she were not a-kin to me, I would as soon marry my grandmother.

Mrs. Con. Ah, poor soul! every body knows, as well as myself, I am more than tolerably handsome:

and (which you are ready to tear your flesh at) the whole town knows you think so.

Lord G. Madam-did your ladyship ever hear so transcendant an assurance?

Lady Gent. Nay, I'm on your side, my lord-I think you can't be too free with her.

Lord G. I'll tell your ladyship what this creature did once; such an instance of her intrepid self-sufficiency

Lady G. Pray let's hear it. Ha ha!

Mrs. Con. With all my heart, I'll be heard too. Lord G. I'll tell you, madam-About two years ago, I happened to make a country visit to my Lady Conquest, her mother, and one day at the table, I remember, I was particularly pleas'd with the entertainment, and upon enquiry found that the bill of fare was under the direction of Mademoiselle here: now it happened at that time, I was myself in want of a housekeeper; upon which account I thought it would not be amiss, if I now and then paid her a little particular civility to be short, I fairly told her, I had a great mind to have a plain good housewife about me, and dropt some broad hints, that the place might be her's for asking-Would you believe it, madam, if I'm alive, the creature grew so vain upon 't, so deplor. ably mistook my meaning, that she told me her fortune depended upon her mother's will, and therefore she could receive no proposals of marriage without her consent: ha, ha! Now, after that unfortunate blunder of her's, whether I ever gave my lady the least trouble

:

about the business, I leave to the small remainder of her own conscience.

Mrs. Con. Madam, as I hope to be married, the poor wretch fell downright in love with me! for though he design'd only to make two days stay with us, it was above three months before I was able to get rid of him. When he came first indeed, he was a pretty sort of a tolerable impudent young fellow; but before he left us, O, the power of beauty! I most barbarously reduc'd him to a sighing, humble, downright dulness and modesty.

Lady Gent. Ha, ha! Pray which of you two am I to believe all this while?

Lord G. Madam, if there's any faith in my senses, her only charms then were, and are still, not in rais. ing of passion, but paste. I own I did voraciously admire her prodigious knack of making cheese-cakes, tarts, custards, and syllabubs; Ha, ha, ha!

Lady Gent. Ha, ha, ha!

Mrs. Con. You see, madam, what 't is to let him be ever so little out of one's hands: now his very modesty is impudence; for to deny his being in love with me to another, is ten times more insolent, than his first owning it to me.

Lady Gent. Pshaw, words signify nothing-Did he ever own it under his hand?

Mrs. Con. His hand! Ha, ha, ha, madam-as I am a living creature, if I have one, I have five hundred billet doux of his, where he has confess'd such things of my wit and parts, and my eyes, and my air, and

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